A few years ago when I was working at a Christian credit union, we had a theme for the year of “Rest and Renewal” – a bit of an anomaly in the midst of an economic crisis and one of the busiest years we’d ever had. The verse to go along with it was from Jeremiah: “Restore us to yourself, O Lord, that we may be restored”.
During that time, our Marketing team took off for Laguna Beach one day for team-building and rest. We did a photo scavenger hunt themed on “rest”. The most memorable picture was this one of my friend Nate, sitting in the middle of a busy street, reading his bible (notice the oncoming traffic behind him. And don’t be fooled by the scope of the lens, there were many cars coming from both ways):
The scavenger hunt item was “rest in the midst of chaos”.
So, what’s the point of this random story?
I find more and more that this is the lesson we are to learn. When life gets chaotic, I often think “ugh, if I could just get away on that vacation” or “man, if I could only have a few days of peace and quiet to think and accomplish some things”.
In fact, that was my exact thought the past few days. I longed for a day without people, phone calls, or events so I could accomplish some of my growing to-do list that had contributed to a tearful, stress-induced breakdown.
But on Monday, I spent almost the whole day in meetings, conversations, and stayed up much later than I planned. The following day, I had an unexpected visitor, followed by an unexpected phone call from someone who just needed to talk, and then another late night with some friends from church.
I realized that, without shunning all responsibility and ignoring every need and interruption, there really can’t be any break. I can’t get away from “it all”. And even when I have in the past (on vacation, for instance), it feels like God is quiet, and the amazing rest and genius insight I was sure I’d find lying on beach never came.
Ironically enough, in the days following my breakdown, I had some of the most insightful bits of wisdom, and creative and practical ideas come to me. Things I’ve been searching for, or just unaware I needed to know, for quite some time. The point of desperation brought me to greater reliance on God and forced me to look at what hadn’t been working and why, where I had to find solutions and make changes.
Whether it was in the middle of a conversation, praying while brushing my teeth, or driving the traffic-jammed 101, God dropped idea after energy-filled idea into my head. I wasn’t sitting in a quiet coffee shop racking my brain, or sipping a margarita in Hawaii, or necessarily even sitting in my bedroom in prayer. But God was speaking – loud and clear.
David often says that church shouldn’t be a place of escapism. Really, nothing in life should ever be about escapism. Because reality is always waiting for us when we return. It’s more about learning how to live in that reality. That we can’t escape; that there’s no quick fix; that you can’t ever really “just get away from it all”.
They say short power naps are the best for keeping ourselves energized. And that we should get up from working at our desks for a short break every hour. I think it’s similar with our spiritual life. You might not get hours each day to pray, worship, and listen for God’s voice. But 5 minutes can be just as powerful sometimes.
Jesus gave us a great example. He was constantly “working” – spending time with people, being followed around, accused, asked for things. But he took brief moments of time to spend time with his Father to be renewed. AKA…..rest in the midst of chaos.
Two days ago I was overwhelmed with many aspects of life and crying in my office, just wishing for a little relief. As the next few days have gone on as normally as ever, I’ve found rest and answers that I’ve only searched for and hoped to find eventually.
I DO have a vacation coming up (partially my choice, partially forced on me!) and I couldn’t be looking forward to it more. But I also know that’s not the answer. It’s just the icing on the cake, because I’ve found God, his peace, and his voice…. in the midst of utter chaos.
